1. Do you like my orca mug?

    My CWF,M (coworker & friend, Mike) got his plastic orca mug stolen from our lab last week. That means an after-hours employee was a contestant in a scavenger hunt with “dirty, brown piece of gray, cylindrical plastic” as the most important hint. And don’t you even start to assume Mike misplaced it—NOBODY MISPLACES AN ORCA MUG!!! Besides, the theft is a proven fact, partly because it took place in a scientific science lab, and partly because if you could choose something to steal, you definitely would not seek out the creepy orca mug. It had coffee stains on it, and there’s meth in the fridge.

    But tonight I realized I am only a different strain of your average orca mug bandit. I went to trivia night for the third time at the Lompoc, whereabouts they motivate a bunch of drunk people on the patio to answer 30 trivia questions for a free pitcher of beer. In the last three weeks, I’ve answered 4 questions correctly (MATH BONUS: 30 x 3 = 90. 4/90 = ~4%. ) I am the orca mug bandit of knowledge: I choose the smallest, most worthless bits of information to store in my heart amongst an abundance of meaningful facts and concepts that I ignore. I leave every week, marveling at my acquisition of a college degree. I get science questions wrong when my team is counting on me, I know nothing about music or movies or Cormac McCarthy, BUT!! I know that balsamic vinegar originated in Modena, Italy. 

    So this is a tribute to my trivia team. Henry, Winona, Mladen, and Chris, thank you for accepting me when my mouth hangs open for 3 or 4 minutes and then, with an intense look, say “Liquid. Nitrogen.” in response to “What is dry ice?” Thank you. And to the new owner of the orca mug— coffee sometime?

    1 year ago

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